Archive for December, 2011

Any resolutions?

Nope. Not over here. I’ve made too many in the past that were just as quickly broken.

A friend sent me a picture of a stack of books twined with Xmas lights for my ‘Vision Board’, saying that maybe next Xmas I could do that with my own books. Nice thought and I’m happy Darlene has that much faith in me. I’ll admit, I had no exact idea what the Hell a ‘Vision Board’ was until a few days later. I was only guessing, then laaaaaa! I see, said the blind man. Might do that board thing.

So! How about what I’ve learned in the last year? Not that you care, but here we go. These things, I know!

It might have been a bad idea to bring my grandmother down to Georgia from North Carolina to live with us. It was perhaps unfair to her as well as my family to try and take care of her special needs when we have a semi-hard time taking care of our own personal versions of craziness. She’s gone back now, but her cat stayed. I love them both, the cat a lot less than her. Grams is happier now. I think we all are. And I don’t think we should feel bad about it, because we at least tried when no one else would.

It was a good idea to write OW, even if I’m no longer in love with the title and desperately need a new one. I should have done this years ago and have no idea under the gods why I didn’t. Nothing legitimate, anyway. I know more about writing than I thought, the self-doubt is no longer such a monster and the melt-downs have been limited to the one. It took me seven months to get to this place, and I like it. It doesn’t suck.

I learned just yesterday that I can make at least one person out there cry with something I wrote. I can make at least one person fall in love with one, or more, of my invisible friends. At least one person out there wants more.  That’s significant because for the last ten+ years the only person who cared about something I wrote was Nia and she’s biased, so I wouldn’t count her. LOL!

I also learned that sometimes a blue curtain is just a blue curtain, no matter what your English teacher says. There are a lot of ‘blue curtains’ in OW, but sometimes it does go a little deeper. While writing OW I learned just how deep the wound of Kal’s loss goes. Yeah, I know, she was a cat, but she was my girl. My little muse, even if neither of us knew it at the time.

(Love you, Kal!)

I’ve laughed with fellow writers until I was blue in the face. Leaf blowers and zombies, anyone? Met some incredible people I wouldn’t have otherwise ever imagined meeting. Boggled over companies like Publish America (RUN! RUN FAAAR AWAY!). Been inspired to write smut and quickly regained my senses. LOL! I’ve dragged-ass into the gas station before the sun rises way too many times, grinned far too much when asked how the book’s going – when I finally got over that blindsided feeling. In short, I’ve had just the BEST time. I’m happier.

I’m thankful.

So… maybe one resolution. Keep writing.


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On both Saturday and Sunday I was up at the butt-crack of dawn and at a complete loss as to what to do. Normally, I’m opening the laptop and working on OW before the sun rises. But… I’m not allowed to open OW and work on it for a while. Must resist the urge to work on the book. Luckily, being the holiday weekend, I eventually found things to do.

This morning I slept until 7:52am, interrupted only by Bobby’s alarm clock. It was bliss. I haven’t slept that late in months. I owe it to the new Kindle because I was up a tad late, reading. Miraculously enough, I haven’t sweat too much over Lex having the book. Every now and then it’ll tweak me, but I’m able to move past the jitters and forget about it. I’ve been doing well with not writing, not thinking about it. What I wasn’t counting on was the influence of The Magic Bus.

Someone pulled out in front of Bobby yesterday, sending his truck slamming into a curb, jumping it, and blowing out his brake lines in order not to become a smear on the road. I had to get up and take him to help out at the hobby shop today. This leaves me alone in my van on the way home. And it started.

Do I really want to call it An Ordinary World? Not really anymore, no. I have to resolve that and find a series title. Man…. Do I really want to do this? Gods help me, I have to start book two and soon because OW is series material, not stand alone, and if I query an agent one of the first issues will be is there a book two? Where do I start book two? What’s the opening scene? What was purposefully left unresolved that I can start with? Fernando? Sebastian? Nita? Lien might be a good way. Even Este and the fire resolution. I dunno. What about Juliet? Or does that need to wait until like book three? I have four years of completely unwritten history that I can play with. Nothing is established during those four years and I can do whatever I want, where OW was an already established storyline. This could be fun.

Stopping at the light, I narrowed my eyes at my purse between the seats. My little black and white college notebook that I bought the other day specifically for notes on book two is so nice, and neat, and clean. It needs ink. With a nice, new flowy pen. Pretty ink, my precious….

I walk back in the house, notebook in hand and my child cuts me off at the door. Store. We need my Santa Cookies (Pepperidge Farm, Sausalitos) that I forgot to buy myself on Christmas Eve. *face palm* Notebook back in the purse. Back out again. But! She’s with me, so the magic of the bus doesn’t kick in. And doesn’t resurface.

We’re going to spend the day together in a way we haven’t in a long time. Just the two of us. Chili with no beans is heating on the stove, loaf bread to dip in the chili – a long time tradition belonging just to me and the child, Santa Cookies and movies. Piled up in my bed. Just us.

She’s not a child anymore, she’s twenty, but this still applies:

They say children create their own magic. Sometimes, lucky for me, they can break spells, too.





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Let’s see what happens…..

So. I’ve been busy NOT telling anyone anything about what I’ve been doing for the last few days because I was planning something super sekrit.  *shh*

On Thursday, I printed two copies of (tentatively titled) An Ordinary World to go to the beta reader. I’m not completely happy with it, I hate the last few paragraphs to tell you the truth, but I’d like their input before I go on. Here’s the thing….

Lex doesn’t know she’s getting it. Garrett, her husband, does. Lex doesn’t.

*MMMMWAHAHAHAHAHA* *shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*

It’s wrapped up in holiday paper, complete with a bow to go under their Christmas tree. The box was almost too small, so it’s bulging out the sides some. And it’s heavy. Each copy is wrapped in tissue paper inside the box. One copy is for her to keep and read for things that come to her later – or if I have questions, she can find what I’m talking about, the other has several red pens  attached.  (And, oh.. man. Watching it go out the door threw butterflys the size of pterodactyls into my stomach.)

Here’s what’s going to happen annnnnnnny time now.. Like seriously, any minute now, while I’m posting this..

Garrett has to put together toys tonight, so he’s going to tell Lex she can open one gift and put MY box in her hand. See, she’s been eyeballing me hard since I gave her the first half a few months ago. Now she gets the full draft and will go read it and will stay out of Garrett’s hair while he puts toys together. LOL! I don’t think she’ll complain. Well, I hope not, but that’s another blog.

I feel like a Steve Irwin type, waiting on my cell to go off.

“Blimey! It’s a beta reader in her natural environment! And she’s about to be surprised with the story she’s been knocking people over the head about for two months!

Let’s.. see.. what.. happens!”


Gotta’ have fun with this stuff, ya’ know? If you don’t, the hair pulling, Maalox drinking, family abandonment, no-sleep-getting process is just not worth it.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd she calls before I can even post this. LOL! I do believe she’s bouncing off the walls. 🙂

Now THAT is a Christmas present right there. Oh, no… not for her. FOR ME. Made me grin that she’s that excited to have it. 🙂

Happy Holidays, everyone! I’m taking a break and not writing a WORD for two weeks. LOL! Ta!

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62, 164

Damn, it’s been a long day.

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Hitting delete on a few sentences is hard. Hitting delete on over three-hundred words at the end of a ten hour marathon editing day just SUCKS so BAD.  I was so proud when it went over 61.1k, now it’s sitting at 60.7-ish.


The scene didn’t fit, though. Well, it did, but it didn’t. It was totally a Nita thing to do.  But I didn’t like it, I hated it, it gave me fits for a week just knowing it was there. (I wrote it last weekend.) It tangled up my head and made such a cluster fuck out of everything else because it was THAT distracting a subject.

*select – delete*


I feel better now. Freer to finish what I’m doing. Is that even a word, freer? How about ‘more free’? Yeah, ok. Whatever. I feel better. LOL!

I have a self-imposed deadline on something coming up and that deadline is giving me a fit. But with that ‘delete’ I figured out that IT was the huge problem that was fueling my crazy the most and holding me back. Damn. Just damn. One page of work throws you for a loop. It’s nuts, dudes.


What’s even more nuts is I kept it, just in case it needs to go back. LOL!

I’m done, I’m tired. Back in the morning.


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Not tonight, my dear…

58,002 becomes 59, 542.

And I’m so tired. Uncle.

People who don’t work in offices think that people who do have it made. No.  Sorry, the sitting on our ass bit is physically hard, too. My shoulders knot from being on the computer all day, I get headaches from staring at the screen. Your body gets exhausted, your back hurts, your brain gets tired. So, what do I do when I’m off? Sit at the computer from 6-7:30 in the morning and write until my fingers and eyes bleed while I pull my hair out.

Am I stupid or what?

Not really. I’m having the best damned time going bald.

I finally went through all my notes from the first War Room and my meltdown. Major revisions are over. I still have something that bugs me that I want to explore before it goes back up on the wall, lots of polishing to do after that, but I’m happy. I’m a huge, huge step closer to sending it to the beta readers. So, just when my mind clears – fancy that, eh? – and I sit down to update the word count, guess what one of the characters says?

“I know.”

Two familiar words, I swear I’ve heard them from another character along this journey. I’d have to check the blog. But in this case it fixes what was bugging me, explains their motive more clearly, and I’m too tired now to care.

The husband is cooking dinner – Country Fried Steak, OMG – and I will be fat, happy, popping a cholesterol pill and watching Once Upon A Time, not caring what they ‘know’. Sometime this week, the War Room returns. Just not tonight.

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Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, no.

Yesterday’s attempt was a complete bust. I think I added ten words and had to walk away after only an hour. Some days the spice just does not flow. I made myself happy by using Amazon’s one-click buying. Book 2 of the Maker’s Song series, In the Blood, by Adrian Phoenix. In print.

Today, though, I made it to 58, 002. There are less than ten chapters left to edit as of right now. I’m stoked, but not. Mostly I’m tired. Yesterday’s inability to write sucked and tomorrow I have jury duty. Yay. Me. I so wish I could get yesterday back.

During one of my breaks today the husband asks me what happens when I’m done with this round? Back up on the wall. Then what? Search for all those nasty repeated words. His brow went up. Ok, ok, and polish, polish, polish. In other words, more things than I really want to sit here and say. He asked me if it was normal to take so long to write a book? I’ve only been working on it since the end of May, but yeah, in fact, it is.  Sorry, love. I might not be done by January.

He pretty much waved my Xmas pressie under my nose to tempt me away from the laptop. Kindle Fire. Shiny.

I ran back for the safety of my huddled corner of the kitchen and reminded myself that I bought Adrian’s book yesterday. In print. Good little fan-girl, good.

I feel a little like I’m betraying the print industry and book stores everywhere with this Kindle. To be honest, I’m Amazon’s bitch since they closed the Borders and the Books-A-Million here and I feel like I’ll become even more one now. The other two book stores that remain in this back-wood town are in the mall. Um, no mall for me, sorry. So, I order everything online and kinda’ do feel like shit about it.

I do have Kindle for PC on my laptop, but I have less than ten books on it and have read only three of them. I hate to read on my laptop after spending the whole day staring at the screen. Guess those ten get a new home soon. Leia brought up a good point. She owns a Nook and still buys print of her favorites. I’ll still do that, myself, I’m sure. Two of the digital copies I have are about to be bought in print just because I loved the books. Double-ching for the author’s wallet.

I dunno. I’m still in here hiding from the Kindle. He wants me to go ahead and open it now since I know its here. Nuh-uh. I have a book to finish and I’m a gadgetty kinda’ person. I get that thing in my hands and I won’t make it back to writing for weeks. Nu-uh.

How do you feel about it? The whole digital revolution? I don’t want to give up my dream of holding my book in print in my greedy little hands, but it sure seems like books are going the way of the music industry. Why buy a whole cd of music for $15.99 – and pay for songs you don’t want – when you can buy one song at a time for .99 for your iPod? So… why buy a $25 hardback when you can get a digital copy for $14.99 or much, much less (if not free) on Amazon for your nifty Kindle?


(I’m going to go reread book one in the Maker’s Song series. A Rush of Wings. *plug, plug, plug*)

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